Even if your spouse decides to behave aggressively or hostile, remain cool, and calm. You don’t have to respond to every provocation by your ex-spouse. Remember, that you are not playing that game anymore. You are now divorced, and how your ex-spouse behaves is none of your business.
If you are going to drop your child at your ex-spouses home for a visit, then make sure that you do not intrude on his or her space by stepping into the home. Remain outside until you are invited in.
Keeping communication to a minimum is absolutely recommended when you are handing over a child, and you’ve just been through a hostile divorce. Sometimes, talking actually makes things worse. Restrict communication to e-mails, SMSs, or other telephone calls.
Remember, that if you get into an argument in front of the child, it is only likely to traumatize or upset the child further. It may be a good idea to bring along a family member or a friend, who is calm, and can help prevent you from losing your temper or getting into an argument.
The holidays can be especially tricky for parents who are sharing custody of their children. Your holiday schedule will be included in your visitation schedule, finalized as part of your divorce. However, it is important for you to communicate with your spouse, and plan out exactly how you will carry out the logistics involved in dividing the child’s time over the holidays.
If you’re planning a holiday with your child in deviance from the normal visitation agreement, ask your ex-spouse beforehand. Don’t simply change plans without giving the other person notice. Make sure that all of the plans that you make are communicated to your ex-spouse beforehand, to avoid any misunderstandings. Don’t change plans at the last minute.
Try to be cooperative with your ex-spouse if he or she wants to change holiday plans this season. Remember, there may be a time in the future when you want some accommodation made in the visitation schedule when you have holiday plans with your child, and if you accommodate your spouse’s request now, he or she is much more likely to be flexible later.
For help drafting a visitation schedule, schedule a consultation with a Boca Raton child custody lawyer.
